with the columbine shooting, my son craig survived but rachel did not. it was like there were times when it was real, and other times it wasn't and you kind of block out the pain of that. the anguish of that. or at least a year or possibly more, there were times when i was just going through the motions of having lost rachel. also having to deal with a very emotionally crippled young man, because this gentleman witness all of the violence. and then his sister was the first one that was killed. my heart races. i just feel that these parents -- they are going to hurt so bad for so long and there's there is not much you can do to console them. losing a little child like this, it makes me very angry. it makes me extremely angry [crying] megyn: in the same way that your daughter and son were totally defenseless, these children were totally defenseless. the most defenseless you could find on this earth. we are told that there are 26 innocent victims in all of this. including the 18 children. did you find peace? >> we did, but it came much later. but there does